Moments like discovering that you are pregnant or listening to the first heartbeat of your baby have now become sorrowful emotions for mothers in Gaza, where nearly 70% of the over 52,000 people killed amid Israel’s horrific genocide are women and children.
Asil Al Jallad, the first Arab woman doctor to join voluntary emergency medical missions in Gaza since October 7 2023, has lived this gruesome reality firsthand.
The New Arab met her recently in Amman at the Women’s Collective Power to Lead Peace and Security event, organised by the Arab Renaissance for Democracy and Development (ARDD) NGO.
Bringing together Nobel Peace Prize laureates, women leaders and human rights defenders exploring the vital role of women in peacebuilding, human rights, and resilience, Dr Asil shared her experience after she recently returned from her second mission.
Hardships and dangers
“In a situation where people are deprived of everything, where over 90% of the population in Gaza is malnourished, imagine being a woman,” Dr Asil begins, highlighting how women's conditions were difficult even before October 7, considering safety fears amid Israel's siege.
“Add to that being pregnant, giving birth, the burden on your shoulders to raise a displaced family on canned food, while struggling with every single basic hygiene and health condition.”
Her voice rises in intensity as she describes the dreadful daily life at the emergency camp hospitals in Khan Younis and Rafah, where she served.
“We had hundreds of patients every day, we helped many women deliver in a situation where there is a persistent lack of any vital medical equipment or help. On average, a woman would stay just one hour after delivering, given the scale of the emergency we were facing.”
The worst, in this case, was to let women take this decision against medical advice, consent and against their will due to a lack of capacity.
“Imagine a new mother, who has just delivered, doing this with no choice while fearing unexpected situations that might prevent them from reaching their homes,” adds Asil angrily.
A woman on a mission
Originally from Palestine but born and raised in Jordan, like over 60% of the Jordanian population, Asil Al Jallad describe herself as “doctor by passion, mother with a mission, a woman after a cause.”
Through her Instagram and YouTube channels, one can see how passionate she is about her job, having often participated in TV, radio shows and public events to challenge the community’s perspective towards sexual and reproductive health.
“After October 7, standing by and doing nothing became unbearable," she tells The New Arab, so she did all she could to go to Gaza.
The first time she travelled to the besieged enclave was in February 2024, when she had to fight to convince the Jordan Medical Association that obstetricians and gynaecologists were needed. The second time she travelled there was recently in March 2025, during Ramadan. She reveals how Israel showed no mercy nor respect for the Islamic holy month.
"As soon as people had broken their fast for Iftar, the bombing would restart," she shares.
But the level of destruction between the two experiences is not comparable, Dr Asil adds.
“When I went last year, it was five months into the war. But this time, it was ten times worse,” she continues, explaining bluntly that “genocide is an understatement, here we are very much beyond what humans can imagine and describe.”
Israel's violation of the ceasefire last March during Dr Asil's second mission and its complete halt to the access of aid imposed made her work even more difficult.
“This time we thought we could work on reproductive health, with a focus on awareness as well as looking to improve hygiene conditions," she explains.
"But there was absolutely nothing standing. Now, there is a dire need for basic medication, and the capacity to assist is minimal. To assess and calculate pregnancies, we had to use our assumptions because there are no means of diagnosing.”
Dr Asil reiterates doctor and writer Haya Ahmed's words about how women's health is facing a war of its own, and gynaecological illnesses continue to worsen by the hour amid Israel's horrific genocide.
Women do not have access to the necessary means to deliver safely, they do not have medicine, vitamins, or even the correct menstrual products.
Furthermore, there is a widespread lack of necessary equipment needed to assess the risks of missed chromosomal or congenital abnormalities.
Sadly, Asil has witnessed women who have lost their lives during delivery, while many others go into their delivery suffering from psychological issues due to the genocide or as widows.
'Women gave me a power that I never thought I had'
Those memories are too fresh for Asil not to break into tears, but at this stage her account becomes more passionate, as she explains what moved her, a mother of two, to go and support women in Gaza.
“I could not sleep anymore at night,” she simply puts it.
Having grown up seeing the news of Israel's brutal occupation, sieges, bombings, and the violence of settlers on television, Dr Asil says these images have stayed with her since childhood.
Her family, originally from Tulkarem, had come to Jordan as refugees and had not seen or visited Palestine since then.
“Each night, I felt guilty putting my children to bed safely,” she admits. “Guilty for having the privilege to do so while, just a few kilometres away, other women and children were being killed.
"Many people told me I should not have left my two young kids (10 and 8) to risk my life. But I look at things differently: I needed to leave for them, to be an example. Because if you seek change in the world, it should start from within.”
Most of all, Dr Asil makes clear that what she has done is the bare minimum compared to the immense needs of over two million Gazans who have lost everything.
Instead, she says she has found inspiration through Gazans who have given her hope again in humanity and inspired her to do more.
“Palestinian doctors and nurses have been fighting for generations, for humanity and justice," Dr Asil says.
“Palestinians in Gaza, especially women, have given me a power I never thought I had. They keep bringing life to the world amid death and destruction. What better act of resistance is that?”
Stefano Nanni is a freelance writer with a background in the aid sector. Based in Amman, he has lived in Iraq, Lebanon, and Jordan for the past 12 years. He is also the author of a book about the Iraqi poet Latif Al Saadi
Follow him on Instagram: @stef.nanni